I should have just stayed in bed all day - but then who would feed the dog? The dog, of course. He’d eventually get up on a stool and eat a bar of soap or something. No, up and out.

The family’s been gone since Thursday, and today was the first day it actually seemed like they were gone; this must be what it’s like when workaholics get fired and find out that the family they last remembered as a collection of vague faces around t he Christmas tree had actually moved away several years before. Explains why the laundry was piling up, I suppose. It’s not as if I haven’t had down time, but what I’ve needed is the sort of down-time you can enjoy because you know it’s followed by additional down-time. Last night I wrote the Tuesday column between 12 midnight and 1:30 AM - I’d been putting it off all weekend, and was about to say ahhh, vacation day, but there really wasn’t any excuse. I could do it. So I’d better, then. When all you have to do for your job is write three columns a week, well, you’d best do them.

So. Saturday I went back to the Fair for two local hours with Hugh Hewitt - much fun, that. He interviewed me for the entire duration. Hah! And he thinks he has a future in radio! Sunday was the boat cruise up and down the Mississippi on a paddleboat with three 1280AM hosts imported for the occasion - the genial & perspicacious Hugh, of course, and the relentlessly incisive Michael Medved, and Mike Gallagher. Got to meet some charming people; spent the first part of the cruise hanging in the front with the popular kids. By the end of the ride I was tired and I had a jackhammer headache; shouting and standing in the sun and two vodka-tonics will do that to you.

That night Hugh, Medved, his charming son Danny, the Giant Swede and the Crazy Uke came over for supper, and that was . . . well, it was just very cool. As the Uke said at one point, “what happens in Minnesota stays in Minnesota.” I didn’t say I’d be writing about it, or make them sign waivers, so I’ll just say it was probably the high point of a weekend that was itself the high point of the summer.

Yes, me an writer! And a gud one! The high point of the high point!

See what I mean? I’ve hit the wall.

That night I watched a movie, but halfway through I got the itch to sample the dialogue and make another MP3 out of it all. My sad gift to you. As for the samples: that’s Edward G. Robinson saying “It’s horrible” and “I love you, Thorn.” Celia Lovsy (T’Pol!) says“You must accept it.” The scratchy voices are a TV commercial from the movie; the synthesized voice is from the trailer, as is the “YOU WILL FIND OUT!” segment. As for the other guy - you’ll figure him out soon enough.

I suppose it’s as bad as the rest, but if I’m going to release it I should do it on Tuesday. Because Tuesday is -

Well, YOU WILL FIND OUT what it is. Right now it’s a secret. Until you go here, of course.

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