Are they up on a hill above the beach, or are they giants? Do they have to scrape off the crushed remains of humans upon whom they trod so carelessly while walking along the water's edge?

Well, what have we today in the old "everything must go pile"? Something I don't think anyone's seen in decades. A cursory image search didn't turn up anything, and let's pretend I used all possible search terms and clicked through at least three pages of search results.

As Regular Visitors know, I love movie theaters of yore - the marquees, the lobbies, the interiors, all the things that brought style and romance to the small towns. The big huge theaters are sometimes hard to research, because you're reminded how spectacular the spaces were, and how they ended up trashed and demolished.

Even if they look a bit . . . overwrought.

I apologize for the resolution. Here's the whole page:

Here's the theater we're talking about.

 

It was enormous. Not the thing you want to open in 1928 with itchy creditors.

The paper ran pictures of the interiors, and since my study of the place over the years hasn't yielded too many good pictures, I wonder if these have ever been seen in better quality.

"One of the foyers with rest-room adjoining."

It's like a shot of an ancient civilization. I suppose, in a way, it was.

 

Not an inch of the interior was unmolested by gilt or geegaws.

Do the words "Fire Risk" come to mind?

Every theater must have a pointless niche on the side. I suppose it reminded people of the balconies where the ultra rich would sit, but the architect wasn't content with that. NEEDS LIONS!

Perhaps it's just me, but that middle tier of boxes would be a leeeeeetle bit claustrophobic.

Swank when it opened, but you can imagine how it would look after years of indifferent maintenance. Chipped plaster, cigarette butts in the corner.

You'd better fill every one of those seats filled if you wanted to make your loan payments:

You had to pay the orchestra regardless of how many people showed up.

And now, the punchline:

All that space, and such a tiny screen.

More on the building can be found here, at lileks.com, if you're interested.

 

 

 

 

 

And now, the conclusion!

 

Gosh! As opposed to sudden wretching.

Well, what do you think? How would you rule?

Your answer is here, but you probably peeked.

 

That'll do: see you Monday.

 

 
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