Dad, dad! I brought in a gusher at the mine!

What do you mean, son?

I was down at No. 10 and I was playing with the controls and there was a big bang and gold and silver started shooting out of the top of the mountain just like an oil well!

Father stares into the distance for a few minutes, realizing his son had actually ruptured the containers containing pressurized mercury, which must have shot through the loosely-packed stone over the mine entrance and liquified the stored gold as it passed upwards. The environmental costs for clean-up were going to be extraordinary.