This is the set of every witch-related “Night Gallery” episode, right here.

A large croissantipillar appears to have crawled on the sofa. And that’s no ordinary sofa: I just know that the piping is plastic, and that it breaks off and scrapes the underside of your thigh when you’re wearing shorts.

I swear: half my dates in my early 20s involved a trip to This Room to meet parents.